Not Motivated

I am not really motivated to get anything done right now.  I have so much I need to do before my second class starts tomorrow at 6 PM.  My textbook still has not come yet so I can't do the reading that I needed to get done for tomorrow's class.  Not looking forward to the feeling of anxiety because I didn't do my reading and I don't have my textbook yet. 

I did hear back from my school placement advisor and if I wanted they could of asked to see if I could do my ESL observation at Ben's school but they would have to ask the distraction and I really don't have time for that.  Also, if I wanted they could of asked to have my student-teaching done their too.  I thought about it, but decided not to.  It would be nice to be with Ben but Ben is just a long-term sub, so there is a chance they might not hire him full-time and I always do this thing where I fit my schedule to chase guys and then it back fires on me.  Plus, if something happens between Ben and I, it would be awkward.  So now I am going to pray for a miracle that I will have an ESL student by Tuesday or at least more time to find one.  I just need to stop being lazy and make phone calls and send e-mails out.  I was going to do that today but I wasn't feeling it.  My head was pounding, which probably has to do with the heat so I have been drinking water more and staying cool.